The Get Ready Money Podcast

The Get Ready Money Podcast with Naseema McElroy: Being Financially Intentional

• Tony Steuer

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On the latest episode of The Get Ready Money Podcast, I spoke with Naseema McElroy, founder of Financially Intentional, Author and Nurse about how we change the way we think about money and being financially intentional.

In this episode we discussed:

  • The importance of changing your circle of influence. 
  • Why anyone can get on the right path.
  • Learn what real wealth is - be an owner, not a consumer.
  • You can afford anything, just not everything.

Naseema McElroy is the founder of Financially Intentional, a platform about personal finance and living life intentionally.  Naseema is the author of Smart Money: The Step-by-Step Personal Finance Plan to Crush Debt. Naseema discusses how taking control of her finances has enabled her to overcome bankruptcy, divorce, and break the cycle of living paycheck to paycheck. She shares her lessons along her path to help others benefit from the freedoms of financial independence.  Outside of encouraging people to get their financial act together, Naseema is a mother and Labor & Delivery Nurse.

Connect with Naseema McElroy:

Website: https://www.financiallyintentional.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/naseema-mcelroy-162085122/


Book: 

Smart Money: The Step-by-Step Personal Finance Plan to Crush Debt (Amazon) 

Podcast: 

Financially Intentional Podcast: https://www.financiallyintentional.com/podcast


Community:

Financially Intentional Community - Facebook (here) https://www.facebook.com/groups/financiallyintentional/

Support the show

Speaker 1:

Are you looking to get ready, be prepared and transform your financial future? Then you've come to the right place. This is the Get Ready Money Podcast with Tony Stewart, where Tony has insightful conversations with financial experts who are changing the way we think about money. Catch up on the latest financial trends and hear practical advice from Tony and his expert guests so you can build healthy habits that work, Be empowered with tips for implementing small changes that can have a big impact on your financial future. So sit back and get ready to hear from today's guest.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to the Get Ready Money podcast changing the way we think about money. I'm pleased to be joined today by Nesima McElroy. Nesima is the founder of Financially Intentional, an author and a nurse. In this episode, we'll be discussing Nesima's thoughts on how we change the way we think about money and being financially intentional. Nesima, welcome to the Get Ready Money podcast.

Speaker 3:

Hey, I'm happy to be here.

Speaker 2:

Excited to have you on today. So, to get started, tell us a little bit about yourself. What is your origin story?

Speaker 3:

I guess this is a very interesting origin story. I mean, not really. I just was never really taught about money. So I was raised in Oakland, california, by a single dad who, you know, kind of struggled with money throughout his life and so you know, had maybe $5 a week for allowance and kind of had to get it in really early. So, again, single dad or two girl, and so he didn't know how to do our hair, and so from an early age I had to learn how to do hair. But I had to do my hair and I had to do my sister's hair, which was really annoying to me because she's really annoying.

Speaker 3:

She was really annoying, and so I'm like if I gotta do this, I better make some money off of it. And so I started being like the neighborhood person to go to to do hair and started learning how to make money really early and thought that that meant that I was good with money. And so that continued with me all the way through high school, college, grad school, you know like knowing how to make money but then not knowing how to build wealth. And so when I was growing up I kind of lived in these two different worlds. Right, I lived in West Oakland, which in the 80s and 90s was not the West Oakland that we see today. That's kind of gentrified, you know, it's really diverse. It was.

Speaker 3:

It was a lot poorer and I saw like a lot of things that you know were like poverty. You know I was poor, okay, but I went to school in Oakland Hills and my friends' families were. They were doctors, lawyers, you know, and you know generational wealth like all these things, and so my money story was kind of skewed because I was just like I don't look like them, I don't have what they have, and so I'll never be wealthy. But I didn't realize that until I got older that I was subconsciously placing those messages in in the back of my head so I didn't think wealth was possible for me and so I would make money, but I would never have money, I would never keep any of that. And so you know, that's kind of like my money kind of story, origin story, and get a little bit about where I'm from and you know how I kind of approach life.

Speaker 2:

Oh, that's super interesting. So you know, of course, the most important question is that was your little sister, right? Yes, that's a question that's burning on everybody's minds. She's a year and a half younger than me. Like we're close.

Speaker 3:

Like always a year behind in school. So you know, annoying like stealing your clothes, wearing your shoes, like just doing those kind of things just bother you, right yeah?

Speaker 2:

it's got to be a little sister, right, by the way you described it. Hopefully she's not listening so, but you know what you say. I think it's really important for a lot of our listeners out there who you know don't come from generational wealth, you know don't come from general rational wealth and you know it is tough, you know is um for you is what what helped you to start to break out of that cycle and to see, you know, to change your mindset that you could break out of the cycle you know I might look really young, but I'm actually kind of old, and it wasn't until my late 30s that I, like I like sat down with intention and that's what I call financially intentional is that I was like I am going to figure this out, and a lot of it was just had to change the circle of my circle of influence.

Speaker 3:

Right, and I heard that a lot, because what I did to start learning about finances was I started listening to audio books and podcasts and I was just like man, like okay, I can do these little things. But what ended up happening was, first of all, I heard that over and over again like God, I have to change your circle of influence. But I didn't really know what that meant. Like how do you put that in action? Action, like, so I would like go and try to be on meetups and like what do you meet these people? But really, it's about the messages that you receive every day.

Speaker 3:

Right, and if you're receiving messages which is a common american message, that's like consumerism, of having to buy the nice house, the car, like all those things that look really cute on instagram, that's what you're to aspire to.

Speaker 3:

But if you start reprogramming the messages that you hear and that's by changing your social media. I mean who you follow on social media again, listening to podcasts and listening to books, and you surround yourself with people who retired at 25 with millions of dollars in their bank, in their account, but came from nothing, or you know people that have achieved these levels of financial freedom that you didn't know was possible, and those people become your new friends. Like these, are people you engage with more regularly. So it's really like changing that circle of influence that really shifted the way I looked at money and knew that, first of all, it doesn't have to be hard. Second of all, it was for me. I can't do this, because I was seeing people who look like me, with similar backgrounds than me, do these things, and so I say, like everybody wants all these tips and tricks on, like how to build wealth. Really the biggest thing that you can do for yourself is change your circle of influence, change the messages that you get every day.

Speaker 2:

Well, that's powerful and I think that is a great message. You know, is the information you take in is going to impact the decisions you're able to make. But I think you said something in there that I think people often overlook in a personal finance conversation, and that's finding people who look like me or have similar life experiences. It's come up with some of my guests on the podcast is that I think 30% of CFPs are women. Black women make up I can't remember what percentage, but it's minimal, like single dudes. Yeah, it's pretty small. And then Black women carry more college debt. They make less money that you know. There are all these things. So, you know, as a Black woman is you know, what message would you give to other people of color, just to women in general, you know, who are already starting out at a little bit of a disadvantage?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's like my demographic, that's my target audience, because that is me right. Like I said, I didn't start until I was 36. And when I started I had $200,000 in student loan debt. Two master's degrees, very highly educated, I did earn relatively good money, but that's just a product of me being a nurse in the San Francisco Bay Area and that's to do with you know my, my degrees.

Speaker 3:

But representation matters like seriously, like seriously. A lot of times you don't know what's possible for you until like unless it's like unless you see somebody else do it. But I think a lot of times, especially people who have had people that look like them or like see people that they aspire to, that they can relate to, like they really downplay how important it is to have somebody look like you, accomplish things, like we have the Oprahs and we have the Beyonce's. But we need those people just a couple steps in front of us so doing those things that we wanna do. So we know what's possible for us and I think that that's so under like value. But what I did see and this is the beauty of social media is when I started to engage, I started to learn more and find more and more people with similar backgrounds that look like me that were doing the things that I aspire to, and so I think it's so important like to understand that.

Speaker 3:

We do need to see that, and that's another reason why I started my podcast is because I don't have everything all figured out. I'm not perfect, but what I do know is is that people are looking for people that look like me, that can and I can explain things differently than you explain things right, tell me like I'm gonna come at it from a whole different perspective and so people need that. They need that diversification, and even though we're saying the same things, it's gonna be received a lot differently, and so I just wanna it just goes to emphasize the fact that representation matters. We need to see these examples of people, and we are out here, but it's a little bit harder to find because you got to dig for that below 10%.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, no, 100%, and I think that's something that people tend to underestimate is that it's not, you know, and it goes beyond people who look like you, but also people who may have come from a similar background or a similar perspective. Um, you and I have a lot of similarities, but there's a lot of things that are different about us. Yeah, and you know it's neither good nor bad, it's a lot of things that are different about us and you know it's neither good nor bad. It's just some of different experiences and, like you say, how we explain something is just going to be different.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, but I think there's dangers on both sides. Right, the homogeny. I think that we should gather a multitude of experience. I've learned from people of all different backgrounds and demographics, but the whole thing is that I still need to see myself represented in that mix to know what's possible for me. But that doesn't say I only listen to Black personal finance creators, right. Black women personal finance creators no. But I also don't want to just listen to white male personal finance creators. I want to listen to a wide range. I want to understand a wide range of experiences.

Speaker 3:

That way I can take from that information and formulate a strategy that's going to work for me, because I think there's a lot of danger in a lot of the dogmatic approaches that we take in finance in general, especially if you don't understand what somebody is going through, or if somebody takes this person's advice and thinks it's going to work the same for them. It's not. There's a whole lot of different variables that are incorporated in there, so the ability to be able to learn from a range of people is super important.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I think that even gets back to what you were talking about earlier is, you know, the generational wealth thing. It's very different if you see your parents struggling than if your parents are able to pay the bills every month and send you to a nice college. It's a difference and that's going to impact every single financial decision that you make.

Speaker 3:

And you can't beat yourself up over that.

Speaker 3:

Totally. I just remember me coming from West Oakland and then me going to USC, which is dubbed University of Spoiled Children, and having that disconnect like this thing did I mean, and it was horrible. Like it was a real, real shock. Like I only wasn't like for me internally, like oh my god, I can't relate to these people. They're so rich like I don't even understand. It was also that shock of like people like me thinking that I don't belong there, like unless I was an athlete.

Speaker 3:

So every day people walk up to me what sport do you play? And like all these kind of things like, oh, I can only come here because I'm an athlete which I was not, by the way, even though I do look like I ran a run track, so I do have the physique of an athlete, but I'm really just a nerd. But like those kind of messages again were things that made it seem like to me I didn't belong, I did not deserve to build wealth. I mean, I didn't, I didn't deserve to be wealthy because that just wasn't me. Like that's not my background, like I have all these things stacked against me. So, yes, it plays a huge factor.

Speaker 2:

Like, like when you look at the messages you see out in the world I think you said something there that I want to make sure I highlight is that we all deserve to be wealthy.

Speaker 2:

Yes, you know, that's you know that just because of whatever circumstance doesn't mean that you don't deserve to have financial success, and financial success is up to our own definitions. There's no one definition and we're going to get to that for a second, because I do have a question for you on financial success. So you know, one of the questions before we get into the actually a couple more before we get into the get ready questions is is how can people you know, because you talk about financially intentional that's the name of your podcast how can people become financially intentional?

Speaker 3:

I think it's about those tiny little things that we do every day that dictate our money decisions. I think people think they have to have this big master plan or make a certain amount of money or know exactly how to budget. It's not about those things. It's about those little decisions that you make every day to make sure that your money is doing the things that you needed to do for you, whatever that is Like. I'm not beans and rice kind of girl. I'm a Tesla and vacay kind of girl, you know, but those are the things that I like to spend my money on and I make sure that whatever decisions I make on a day-to-day basis support that. And that comes with intentionality, like thinking like this thing that I want to buy, this thing that I want to participate in, is it serving that bigger goal of intentionality? And so that's how we do it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I love that. I'm just taking a note on that because I think that's so important for people. You know, and you said something there too is Tesla's in vacays. If that's what you're into there, that's perfectly fine. It's just you have to offset it somewhere else. You may not be able to have it all, but there's nothing wrong with enjoying yourself and enjoying some of your money, because I think so much personal finance is about. Like you know, give everything up and don't enjoy your life, and you know what. That's not good for you.

Speaker 3:

So that is not. We have one life to live and I like what paula pant says. She says you can afford anything, just not everything. So make those things that you afford you can afford. The things that you value are, like Marie Kondo says, things that spark joy in your life. So that's how I live.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I'm taking another note. People who watch and listen to the podcast sometimes get those pauses for me, because I love taking notes and I love learning from my guests. This is wonderful advice, so you know. One other thing too is you know we've talked a little bit about this is but why is it possible for anyone to be able to get on the right path? Why is no one excluded in your?

Speaker 3:

mind. Well, I want to put, like, a little caveat on there. There are certain people that are just in extreme poverty, right, and those people you have to be able to have a certain income level to be able to build wealth. But the thing is is that there's so much opportunity in this world, so there's a finite amount of ways that you can cut your expenses, right, but there's an infinite amount of ways that you can make money, no matter where you are. Just because of the that we're in the information age right now, right, okay, so there's hope, right. So I just want to let you know, like, if you're not making ends meet, you have to get to a place where you're making ends meet. From that point, there is nothing that's stopping you from building wealth. Just over the last year, with the advent of, like financial technology companies and the way that a lot of investment firms have lowered the barrier to entry, there's almost no excuse for you not to build wealth in some way, shape or fashion. And the key to building wealth is really simple right, you spend less than what you make and invest the rest. It's not that hard and it doesn't have to be super complicated.

Speaker 3:

I tell people and I bring my kids on the podcast. I actually just had a photo that dropped with my five-year-old and my nine-year-old talking about investing, just so people can understand. These concepts are really easy and, first of all, the only way you can build wealth is to invest right. You can't just build wealth by putting money into a savings account. It doesn't have to be in the stock market, it can be in real estate, but you have to put your money somewhere where it can grow. But that investing piece is really overwhelming for a lot of people and I'm like stop, hold on. You don't think you're an investor. You've worked somewhere, right. Even if you're a freelancer and you have your own business at some point in time. You work somewhere. You probably have a 401k or some kind of IRA. You're already an investor. You just have to know how to do that just a little bit better, and it doesn't have to be hard. It's really really simple.

Speaker 2:

I I like to say, you know, because I'm from Oakland, it's hella simple, right. Well, and I think that's super important for people to realize is that you may even be investing in ways that you don't even realize that you're investing, and a lot of it is about the terminology and not being overwhelmed by all the stuff that the money world throws at you.

Speaker 3:

And I think it can be. I think a lot of times people kind of make it over complicated because maybe they have something to sell you. But it's not hard. It's not hard, but it took me until I was 36 years old to figure out that it wasn't that hard. So don't feel bad if you're not at that place right now.

Speaker 2:

A hundred percent, and that's the. You know, what I try to tell people is it doesn't matter the decisions that you've made till today or the situation that you're in. It's about what you do going forward. That's so important.

Speaker 3:

So yeah, definitely start now. I mean, the best time to start was yesterday, but you know start today.

Speaker 2:

Start today today, yes, all right, so let's get into the get ready questions. The first one is what basic money concept do you wish people knew?

Speaker 3:

that investing is not hard. Nice, do you wish?

Speaker 2:

people knew that investing is not hard, Nice and then. So I'm making notes again. Is I love making notes?

Speaker 3:

What is one simple thing you can do each year?

Speaker 2:

to set yourself up for financial success after a raise.

Speaker 3:

I love that even if it's your own business, give yourself a raise and I think that's powerful.

Speaker 2:

When we talk about demographics, um, you know, we talked about a little bit about the gender pay gap. There's also the the racial pay gap. So, you know, ask for what you're worth. You know, I think that's important.

Speaker 3:

The beautiful thing about California is is that we have pay transparency here, and so you can kind of see what people are making doing similar things to you, so it's a great opportunity for you to learn more.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and the internet too is, you know, also given us great resources for being able to see. You know what, what a pay scale is for certain positions. So you know, and if you're not getting paid what you're worth and you know, look for another opportunity, you know. That gets back to what you were talking about. The opportunities is, you know, if you have a skillset, like you, you're a nurse.

Speaker 3:

Nurses are going to get paid, but there's places that will pay you better than others yeah, there's a lot of opportunity things that it just by virtue of like having this platform that I was exposed to that I never knew was possible. I've been consultants for fintech companies because I was a nurse, so it's all. It's just a range of opportunity, a wide range of opportunities out there, and so I just hope people don't sell themselves short. But you don't know what you don't know, but that goes into that circle of influence, right? Change your circle of influence, because you never know what's out there until you start interacting with things that are different than what you're normally 100 and I think he you know again.

Speaker 2:

You know you said so many wonderful things, but you know, don't sell yourself short either. Is don't think that you don't deserve something and I know you talked about that earlier is I think that we all have a tendency to do that. You know some people call it imposter syndrome or whatever is. You know, know your worth and ask for it, and you know that's the only way to get it. People aren't going to hand you things, at least in my experience.

Speaker 3:

Most likely not.

Speaker 2:

I mean, it doesn't happen much, and that's one way to easily be financially successful is to know your value and insist on getting paid for it. Um so, nasima, what is one habit that people can change when it comes to their money?

Speaker 3:

Oh, I think so. Like setting a small amount aside, like, if you don't think you're an investor, just do invest $10 a month to get started, before you figure everything out, because I know a lot of people are like I got to figure this out. Just invest $10 a month and keep on doing that while you're learning how to be an investor. Like I said, it's a lot easier than you think. It'll probably only take you a good day to invest, but just set that as a goal so that you can just get started.

Speaker 2:

I think that's wonderful advice and then you don't have to stress about losing everything if you're starting small, because you, you know you lose $20. That's probably okay, because that's maybe what it costs to get a cocktail now at some places. Coffee, yes, sometimes, or a boba drink if you like boba drinks.

Speaker 3:

I love a boba drink, oh yeah.

Speaker 2:

So what money myth are you trying to break?

Speaker 3:

It's in for everyone. I'm sorry, wealth is for like. I want to break the myth that wealth isn't for everyone. Like wealth is for everyone. I hate to say it negative, but wealth is for everyone Awesome.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I think it was a drop just there, so that's awesome, that's great advice. Oh no, no worries Technology. This is recorded over Zoom, so never perfect. So you know we're going to get out the time machine now. What advice would you give your younger self if you could go back in time, knowing what you know now about money?

Speaker 3:

man, I talk about a lot about investing and I think that's super important, but just try to be more conscious. I just wish I would have learned about what real wealth was earlier and strive towards that. So my way of putting myself back in my partnership is teaching my kids, and so I teach them to be owners and not consumers Like, since they can recognize McDonald's, they can recognize the Tesla symbol. I teach them the importance of owning versus just buying stuff, and so I wish I would have known that so that when I first got those paychecks, I was getting paid a long time ago, right Like cash money.

Speaker 2:

I wouldn't put more aside to building a stronger financial future yeah, and I think that's so typical, you know, when we're in our 20s or teens well, especially you know a teenager, you earn money.

Speaker 3:

it's like I mean I was buying, you know, concert tickets, record albums, food, but honestly, for me, when I was making money, it was to help my household, so there was a lot of that. I had to spend money on bills and things like that because it was tight, but I think, like I said, it doesn't take much. Even if it was $5 dollars, if I would have known to put that aside, I would have done that and still been able to help, you know.

Speaker 2:

So well, definitely and I think that brings us full circle to what you were talking about earlier is that you had to help pay bills, and so it makes a difference in our generational wealth is because, with my money is, you know, what I talked about is I was able to just spend it on what I wanted to spend it out, and you were spending on things that you had to spend it on, and I think that highlights a big difference.

Speaker 2:

But at the end of the day, you were able to, you know, change your money story, like you were talking about, but that you know, but that that impacted you because you didn't have the money to invest, because you had to spend it to get to that spot and and you also talked about that, as you know get to a spot where you can move forward. And I think that's important for people. You know, take care of what you need to take care of and then move forward when you can, but don't beat yourself up. If you have to up, if you have to pay your bills, you have to pay your bills.

Speaker 3:

Oh my God. And that's the whole thing. Sometimes we get stuck in this cycle of regret and then we don't look at it as like you know what. Everything is a lesson. It is not a failure. And even if you think you failed, fail forward. Use those things that you've experienced in your past to help you grow. So don't feel bad. Don't feel bad, it's hard, but really it's all about failing forward. It's all about doing those things and getting those mistakes out early so that you can continue to be successful in your life, and so failure, to me, is just part of learning.

Speaker 2:

Definitely life, and so, um, failure to me is just part of learning experience. Yeah, definitely, you do have to fail in order to, you know, succeed. I mean, I think that's what science is about, is it's failing all over until you eventually get it right. Unfortunately, you don't want to do that with your money, you don't want to fail too many times, and that makes it right. But, like you said, if you're starting with $10 a month, then it's easy to fail with an investment because it's not going to hurt you, and I think that's something just in general with people is, when we talk about investing is that take the majority of your money, be safe, understand what you're doing with it and if you're going to do wild and crazy new things, do it just a little bit of your money, exactly.

Speaker 2:

You got to get Bitcoin or NFTs or whatever you know, just do it a little bit of your money. A little bit. Yes, that's awesome. So you know, to wrap up, what is your number one tip on changing the way we think about money.

Speaker 3:

I'm going to go back to changing your circle of influence. It's really those messages that we hear every day that dictates how we think about these, and if you steer that towards positive money stories, people that you aspire to, and kind of see what they're doing and how they're moving, I really think that's going to change your perspective.

Speaker 2:

That's awesome. That is wonderful advice. So, naseema, to wrap up, is where can people learn more about you? Where can they listen to the Financially Intentional Podcast?

Speaker 3:

So the Financially Intentional Podcast is streamed on all major podcast players Spotify, apple Music or I don't know what it's called now. They always change names.

Speaker 1:

But, everywhere.

Speaker 3:

You listen to your favorite podcast player and I really hang out on Instagram. I talk a lot more about life than finances over there. I intermingled them all but you get to see a little bit behind the scenes of my crazy life over here. But yeah, mostly Instagram, but I love to hear from you, so feel free to DM me. My website is financiallyintensivecom as well, so you know, hit me up. That's awesome. Well, thanks for being here and for you know, hit me up.

Speaker 2:

That's awesome. Well, thanks for being here and for you know and for our listeners and viewers is, as always, in the show notes you'll be able to find links to Nasima's podcast, to her website, to her Instagram profile, so you can definitely catch up with her and Nasima. Thank you so much for coming on today.

Speaker 3:

Thank you for having me. It's a blast.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, this is a lot of fun. Enjoyed it, and thank you everyone for tuning in to this episode of the Get Ready Money podcast. Please be sure to like or subscribe this video Until next time you.

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Tony Steuer

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